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30 Is Not the New 20 – Now is The Time! August 30, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Finances, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, marriage, Real World, Relationships.
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My entire life I have focused on a timeline; I want to be living on my own at 18, I want to be stable at 24, I want to be married by 28, I want a baby at 30. People thought I was crazy, they told me it was too much pressure to box myself into such a strict timeline, but I didn’t see it as an ultimatum, I saw it as a map, a series of gems to collect along my life path to the age of 30. To this day, people don’t get it but Dr. Meg Jay said it best – milestones are important! 

If you want to know why your twenties are, not only, the craziest, but the MOST important decade in your life, mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually, read this amazing Q & A with clinical psychologist and author of The Defining Decade, Dr. Meg Jay. Here’s a quick taste:

“Our 20s are the defining decade of adulthood. 80% of life’s most defining moments take place by about age 35. 2/3 of lifetime wage growth happens during the first ten years of a career. More than half of Americans are married or are dating or living with their future partner by age 30. Personality can change more during our 20s than at any other decade in life. Female fertility peaks at 28. The brain caps off its last major growth spurt. When it comes to adult development, 30 is not the new 20.  Even if you do nothing, not making choices is a choice all the same. Don’t be defined by what you didn’t know or didn’t do.”

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What is that Twenty-Somethings Really Want?! May 22, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, Dating, Family, Finances, Friendships, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World, Relationships, Traveling.
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This article really resonated with me, and everything I have felt at one point or another. Take a read, and remember that you’re not the only one out there who wants the simply things – like a couch that’s not from Ikea (that you probably failed to put together…twice). 

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Work has been crazy over in DLIH land! But I promise, new posts, insightful articles, and more randomness coming very, very soon!!!

Stop Thinking Like a 30-Something, Start Thinking For Yourself! May 4, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, children, Dating, Education, Family, Following Your Dreams, Friendships, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Relationships.
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If you have’t noticed yet, I re-post a lot of Elite Daily articles. It’s a site I really admire because they have a lot of great things to say, especially to twenty-somethings. Most recently, I found this article on how those in their 20’s need to stop thinking like those in their 30’s. While I was reading it, I found myself disagreeing with many of the points that were made. I like reading different people’s views or opinions on life, most of all, how their experiences have shaped them, and I do think that there are always beneficial moments to take from everything you read. However, when we are encouraging or supporting those who are coming up after us, I think it’s very important to reinforce positive information for all types of people and all sorts of girls. We come from different backgrounds, upbringings and cultures, so there cannot be an end all be all of how to live your life, or grown-up or shape your future. So, here is my own version of Why 20-Something Women Need To Stop Thinking Like 30-Something Women (but instead, think for themselves!) –

We have all totally been “that girl”. That girl who had two too many glasses of Pinot and starts off on her pity party about never falling in love, having a baby too late in life, never making it in her career, “I just don’t get what’s wrong with me! How is Lindsay Lohan, who’s a total mess, famous and buying houses and cars while I’m an educated, smart, caring girl and I can’t even get a full-time job, or a boyfriend, or a nice apartment?!” I know I’ve been that girl. (more…)

The Do’s and Don’ts of Awkward Significant Other Meetings March 3, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Friendships, GoodGuys File, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Relationships, Women.
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The GoodGuys File

We’ve all had that moment, we’re meeting our friend’s significant other and could say it’s a little less than what we’d like to be doing that day. Sometimes those meetings are loads of fun but many times they’re just a ball of anxiety in your stomach until you get it over with. Speaking from experience, here are some fun and supportive ways to get through it…and maybe even enjoy it! 

 Your Best Friend’s New Girlfriend 

It’s always exciting when your friend tells you they’re dating someone new! The first thing you always says is “I can’t wait to meet her!” so when you do, remember to respect that this is hard for her so never make her feel like an outsider, invite her in! Meeting a significant other who’s a guy is different, men don’t feel as territorial over friends but women can become very judgmental if they feel another girl is taking their place, so while you should be cautious no matter what gender your best friend’s significant other is, be particularly aware of your behavior if you are the same sex. 

Do!: Talk to them! Never talk around someone, if you’re telling a story tell it to them and use phrases like “You’ll never believe what he did, let me tell you!” or “I have to tell you about this one time he totally embarrassed himself”. This will not only make the night fun but it will make her feel part of the picture and like you accept her. Even if she says or does something wrong, don’t call her out, this isn’t the time or the place. Feel free to voice what you know, but in an open or kind way. 

Don’t!: Talk around her – try not to use words like “we” or “us”, it will make her feel like an outsider, like you don’t want her taking away your best guy friend. Don’t ignore her either, if she also has a statement or story, listen, even if you think it’s dumb or not entertaining. Not everyone you meet will be a winner, but the first meeting is not for you to act rude, it’s to get to know them. They may surprise you! (more…)

The Man Bouquet – Man Crates January 30, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Family, Holidays, Men, Review.
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Valentines Day, oh the glorified day of love, angels, cupid, chocolates, heart shaped everything and the corporate greed of candy companies! Whether you love it or hate it, don’t care about it or count down to the day, whether you’re alone or tied down, it’s a day of dressing to impress and giving gifts.

Women really get the short end of the stick when it comes to buying gifts. Men have jewelry and perfume to choose from, Godiva, puppies, flowers, flowers, flowers. It’s like a wack-a-mole of which present to buy first, when it comes to the ladies, besides a slinky piece of lingerie what do you get your man for Valentines Day?

ANSWER: Man Crates! Mancrates

DLIH discovered Man Crates this time last year for just this reason. Miss SK just got tired of the notion that Valentines Day was all about the girl, so after some digging and internet research Man Crates surfaced. They are pretty much perfect! Not just for V-Day but for any day; birthdays, anniversaries, congratulation presents, or even just because. There are different options, at different price points all themed around whatever your man likes best. Can’t decide? EVEN BETTER! He’ll probably love his first one so much you can get him another next year, or surprise him in a couple of years when he least expects it. They add new ones regularly so there’s no chance of him getting board.

Man Crates are what you think they are, a giant crates! What do guys love more than something they can tear into or break? It’s like a piñata of awesome goodies for your guy. They even have smaller crates that come in something other than – Ammo Can, Tactical Bag, or even just a regular shipping box full of jerky! To be honest, while the enter gift was unique, fun and a complete surprise, the thing DLIH man loved the best was the the Ammo Can, tries to use it for everything!

So, if you’re looking for a unique gift that isn’t simply a bacon scented bouquet of tools try Man Crates on for size. Fine print: order ahead for holidays, they get slammed and since they are a made in USofA business (support the locals!) they only use the best stuff, so give them a breather and don’t rush the creative process!

Making Life Choices…and Facing Hilarious Realities January 8, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in 21st Century/Technology, Apartment Life, Cooking, Dating, Education, Fashion/Clothes, Finances, Friendships, Health and Fitness, Humor, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Real World, Relationships, Shopping, Tattoos/Piercings, Traveling, Women.
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Check out this great post about the Catch-22’s of being in your twenties! Grab a glass of wine, and laugh your bad day away – The 20 Catch-22s Of Being In Your 20’s, by Lauren Martin at the Elite Daily.

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Things Your Little Sister Won’t Understand August 23, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in 21st Century/Technology, Dating, Friendships, GoodGuys File, Humor, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Real World, Relationships, Women.
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The GoodGuys File

When I was about twenty, I would run into a lot of jaded women who had nothing nice to say about men or relationships. “Oh, all that romantic stuff, that’ll end”, or “Ha!, you can never trust a man!” It always bothered me, I felt like, as someone who was younger, you would want to encourage me and teach me and allow me to grow, not just shoot me down and tell me to lower my expectations of relationships. I also didn’t believe what they told me, sure not every relationship is perfect, and sure some people have had bad experiences, but what about those couples celebrating their 40th year wedding anniversary, or that family with three under three and they are still so in love – it doesn’t have to turn bad and boring. However, now that I am the same age as those women, I also laugh at my former self. There is a very distinct line between thinking the world will be a perfect beautiful place, and then the truth of being in a relationship. I recently stumbled upon this gem – “24 Real Facts of Actual Couples…” I sat down and read it with some of my gal pals, also in relationships, and not only did we have a good, solid laugh, but we also almost threw up all over the place. This article was put together by someone who A. probably isn’t in a longterm real relationship or B. Doesn’t know what one is. So, we decided to combat this article and give you the actual REAL version of these 24 REAL couples. (more…)

We Want the Fairytale July 23, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Relationships, Women.
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The GoodGuys File

Ross and Rachel. The Notebook. Marshall and Lily. Carrie and Big. Moulin Rouge. Cory and Topanga. Jim and Pam. Titanic. Romeo and Juliet. We idolize them, these fairytales, these couples that make our realities seem feasible and attainable. It’s not that we put a sheath over our eyes and pretend that all is perfect, and all will be perfect, but at the end of the day, it’s what every girl wants.

When you first start to like someone, or date someone, there are all these butterflies and exciting feelings running through your bloodstream. Every date is a new adventure, every night your head hits the pillow, so does your smile. It’s a very joyous time, and it fills us with hope and some blind ideas of what our life could be like in a couple of years; white picket fences and all that jazz. After that, one of two things happens, it turns sour and you break-up, or it turns out great and you stay together. After a some months, excitement turns more into pride, like you are so proud to say you’ve been in this relationship for a long time and you want to show your significant other off like a trophy. Having them pick you up from work, meet you for lunch, or attend your bosses dinner is like a badge of honor. If you’ve been dating a year or two, everything is more like routine, not to say you don’t love one another, not to go as far as saying your life is boring, but let’s face it, if you left your pump on a staircase your boyfriend would probably just yell out “Hey, moron, you did it again!…Come get your shoe, silly!”

Cinderella and Prince smaller correctIt sounds crazy, because we bury it deep inside, but girls, we want a fairytale. We know that things will become routine, we know that life won’t be perfect, and the only time it’s even acceptable to wear a tiara is maybe on your wedding (…and even then, questionable), but we want the moments that we can tell our future children about. That time that he surprised you with dinner at your favorite restaurant when you thought you were just going to a friend’s place for drinks; that necklace he got you for christmas, the one you had been dropping hints about for months; that day she came home with flowers, just because. Not every girl, not every women, but for the most part, we want cheesiness. For many of us, it’s hard to admit, it’s like some kind of anti-feminist defeat – “Ew, proposals on the end of a dock surrounded by lilies, so lame” but inside, even if it’s very far inside, we’re more like “OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, THAT’S SO PRETTY! SO SWEET! I WANT! AHHHH”. Let’s stop kidding ourselves here. We like it when men write us poems, even though they are really, really bad. We like it when our girlfriend or boyfriend make us a picture book of all our best memories, even though everyone does it.

No one wants to meet someone, have all those giddy feelings, and then just decide “Yup, he’s the one. So now my life can go back to being dull and lifeless.” Of course not! Romance is something everyone craves, romantic comedies are dumb, but we watch them – over, and over, and over, and over. Find that little girl, watching Cinderella all wide-eyed, and never let her go…and most of all, find a partner that loves that little girl too. Dreams can come true, sometimes it just takes a little nudging in the right direction.

July Needs Some Ketch-Up June 27, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Beauty, Dating, GoodGuys File, Health and Fitness, Jobs and Work, Ketch-up, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World, Relationships, Review.
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It’s KETCH-UP WEEK at Doing Laundry in Heels! June has been a rollercoaster of articles, SK traveling, Pascal resurfacing, and even with all that, it still needs some ketchup! So here’s what’s been on the grill this month and what’s been hot!

The Real Life Rules of Respect and Honesty – By Pascal
Respect and honesty are funny things. As far as my experience goes, everyone wants to be respected, and really, most people think they deserve respect in one manner or another, but what are the rules on respect? In the same vein, “honesty is always the best policy” and “relationships are based on honesty”…right?…Read more!

Turning Pretend into Reality
Many of us are very hard on ourselves. If we’ve felt like we’ve battled life alone – we are constantly trying to find the next level of achievement. If we came from wealth, or help, or a life that was created to be easy – we want to prove everyone wrong. If you’ve always been a winner – failure is the ultimate defeat. If you’ve rarely been a winner – then winning is the only thing you strive for. Most of us fall into one of these categories, if not a couple, so with people like us, we’re always searching for the next thing, reaching for the next level, wanting to prove to the world that we made it…Read more!

Detaching From The Situation
“You’re a horrible person.”

“You did the opposite of a good job.”

“What made you think this was a good idea?”

“You’re seriously under performing.”

Things we’ve all probably heard at one point or another. Whether it’s coming from a boss, or co-worker, a friend, a parent or a partner, it’s the worst thing to hear and it’s shocking. When you’re sitting at the opposite end of a table and someone looks you dead in the eye and starts telling you that you’re, basically, worthless, your first reaction is shock. In your mind you’re thinking “What is happening right now? Is this for real?”…Read more!

Simple as Sugar – A Review about Simple Sugars Skincare! (Yum)

Anyone who has spent more than ten minutes with me knows that I have an enormous sweet tooth, probably more so than most other people on the planet. If there’s dessert, I’m there, but I recently found a product that is as sweet as sugar (literally!) but rather than making you breakout and plump up, it does something good for your body…Read more!

The Sides of Needing Space – this month’s GoodGuys File
There are two types of people out there, those who need space and those who do not. Most people like to think they’re one kind, but are probably the other. So, what happens when you’re in a relationship and spending the majority, if not almost all, your time with the same person? What happens you ask? Fights, tension, lashing out or snapping for no good reason. Human beings weren’t meant to be alone, but they weren’t meant to be together 24/7 either. Finding the balance in a relationship is a fine line, but it isn’t an invisible one…Read more!

Oh…and by the way, WE TURNED FOUR IN JUNE! and there was lots of cake!

The Sides of Needing Space June 23, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, Dating, Family, GoodGuys File, Health and Fitness, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Real World, Relationships, Women.
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The GoodGuys File

There are two types of people out there, those who need space and those who do not. Most people like to think they’re one kind, but are probably the other. So, what happens when you’re in a relationship and spending the majority, if not almost all, your time with the same person? What happens you ask? Fights, tension, lashing out or snapping for no good reason. Human beings weren’t meant to be alone, but they weren’t meant to be together 24/7 either. Finding the balance in a relationship is a fine line, but it isn’t an invisible one.

There are two sides to “I need space” and the only way to make it work, is to understand where the other person is coming from. For people who really do need space, it’s about feeling suffocated. People don’t necessarily want to be without you, they also don’t necessarily want to be alone, they just want some air. Like when you’re stuck in a crowded subway car, or a stuffy office building, you just want to get outside – it’s not that you don’t like where you are, or who you’re with, you just need some air. Space allows people to refocus on their relationship, or other things. For many people, they love their significant other so much, it can difficult to really get other things done while they’re together. They make excuses or procrastinate doing things because it’s easy to just hang out or go out when you’re with the person you like. Alone time lets them work on the other elements on their life like work, career, finances, family and friendships. Sometimes, space doesn’t even mean being alone, it means being apart. Visiting family for a week, going out with friends, or even going to work or out after work can be space. It’s a new setting, a new set of people, and if anything, it generally makes them miss being with you more.

Some people simply don’t need as much space as others, probably because they aren’t used to it. Maybe they are an only child, or have felt a lot of separation in their life. To them, needing space is a synonym for all sorts of things – it means not wanting to be with the other person, it means leaving, it brings up the anxiety of being alone, which for many people can be difficult. For people who aren’t used to being alone, or don’t have a need for it, hearing “I need space” is instantaneously negative. It makes them feel like they’ve done something wrong and they’re being punished, it creates a sense of insecurity and even fear. However, some people, they just don’t need space. They are people persons, they like being social, they like chatting and telling stories and laughing and being around people. Not to say that people who need space aren’t like this, but for some people, life is just boring without others.

So, what’s the right way to go about making it work? First rule of thumb; don’t deny people who need space. Telling someone you don’t want them to have time alone is the fastest way to start the beginning of the end. People don’t like being denied something that’s rightful theres, people also don’t like being bossed around. There are going to be moments, maybe fights, where space is the last thing you want but you’re going to have to let them have it because they need it, and your relationship needs it. Second rule of thumb; understanding people who don’t need space. Whether they have an emotional reaction to the word “space”, not like being alone, or simply want you to stop leaving every single time you need to take a breath, listen to them. See where they’re coming from and work to control how often you might need space. Walking away isn’t always the answer, sometimes things need to be handled together.
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