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Taking the Red Pill – Part II September 18, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Finances, Following Your Dreams, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World.
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Read The Fear of Taking the Red Pill – Part I here!

Design your own life, huh? Design your own life. Often times, when I’m looking for DLIH inspiration or reposts, I scour the internet for things that I think will be helpful or encouraging to twenty-something’s out there. When I stumbled upon Gilbert Ross’s article last month, I was so drawn in by the words on my screen. I felt like the universe had pushed me, head first, into that webpage. It couldn’t have come at a better time.

When I left my fulltime job six months ago, I had a plan. Just because you have a plan doesn’t mean you do anything about it. Albert Einstein said, “Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” Everyone can sit down and write out a plan, all it is, is pen to paper. Sure, it’s a step, but if you take no action on that plan, then what was the point? Does it just make a pretty picture? The value is seeing your plan through, not just talking about how successful you want to be. For the last six months my friends and family had been telling me “do something about your plan. Just try!” In the back of my mind I knew I needed to, I knew they were right but I still didn’t do anything about it. The truth is, I was, and still am, absolutely terrified. I think the hardest part wasn’t taking the first step, it was admitting why I wasn’t doing anything about it. Telling people you’re scared is hard.Screen Shot 2015-09-17 at 10.41.03 PM

I won’t lie and tell you that after I got the ball rolling things were easy, they actually got harder. There is an element of embarrassment that comes with starting over in your late twenties. Putting yourself out there for jobs you are overqualified for or to be an intern is difficult, it makes you very vulnerable. Think about when you get rejected for your dream job, it sucks, but at least you tried; now think about when you get rejected for a job you are 100% perfect for, it’s annoying. Now, envision you get rejected for an internship when you’ve been in the workforce for ten years and have loads of experience…what is that, if not embarrassing?

It’s also hard to follow your dream when you’re a grown-up because you still need to earn money, somewhat. I’m lucky that I’m not flipping burgers or ringing items up at Target, I have a part-time jobs that’s in line with my career path but, once again, I’m being bossed around by managers younger than me, or often asked if “I’m in school” or “if this is my summer job”. No, I’m an adult. In fact, I’m so adult that the majority of my friends are either, married, have kids, or a mortgage, or all three! I don’t remember the last time I was out past 11pm and my favorite thing to do is watch movies with my cat. Ask me again if I’m “old enough to drink”, I dare you.

I’m not saying all these things because I want to stifle anyone’s ambitions. I’m saying them because I am confident there are other people out there who are starting over in their twenties and they are going through exactly this. When you’re tired, or confused, or don’t know which step to take next, remember that if not now, then when? One of my friends said something encouraging to me recently; I was telling her, over lunch, how hard this was, what bad timing it was with my wedding and all, and she just sat their with this huge smile on her face as I poured my heart out all over my salad. Then she said to me, “I think this is the perfect time.” It wasn’t much, but she brought a different outlook to the situation. There are people out there who reinvent themselves at 50. It might feel like we’re in a pressure cooker, like we have to make smart choices right now, right this second, because we want to have a nice life in three-five years, but take a step back and look around – people with three kids change careers, people who are forty-five go back to school, if it means having a happier life or following your dream you should do it, you will figure out how to conquer the obstacles later, and you will conquer them.

If starting over when you’re a little older has one advantage it’s that you have been through the ringer once before, you know how to handle life and you’re less flustered when things hit you. The last time you did this you were probably in college or simply younger and you were naive, you thought you’d get a dream job and have a penthouse apartment by the time you were thirty. Now, you know what life is, and how it works and you can handle it, even if you think you can’t. You can.

Just remember, if other people can do it, then you can. You can.

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The Fear of Taking the Red Pill – Part I August 7, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Following Your Dreams, Life Lessons/Growing Up.
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Part one: The most amazing re-post I think I have ever posted/read!

This is an absolutely incredible article by Gilbert Ross, author of The Art of Simple Living and Soul Hiker, a blog. If you have ever wanted to be something more than ordinary, follow a dream, conquer an obstacle, break away from your parent’s ideas of what your life should be like this article will inspire you, up lift you, and motivate you to take risks and be brave. For me, finding this post on Primer Magazine came at the most perfect time in my adult life, and in my twenties (don’t care if it’s a men’s magazine!). 

Designing Your Dream Life: Uncommon Assumptions & Common Misconceptions

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Take the time to read it all, don’t skim, and then read it again! Then keep your eye peeled for The Fear of Taking the Red Pill – Part II!

The Evolving Marketer – Take II July 26, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in 21st Century/Technology, Education, Following Your Dreams, Jobs and Work.
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I don’t often post content that isn’t fresh and original on DLIH, but I recently wrote this post for my professional blog and while writing it thought, “Hey, this is totally relevant!”. DLIH is all about improving yourself, being your best you, and continuously evolving and growing. Professionally speaking, it’s a real reality check to find yourself behind the trend or technology and personally, I always want to be learning something new! So, with out further ado, The Evolving Marketer
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There are many of us who don’t remember life before Facebook; even more so, those of us who often find ourselves reminiscing about that mysterious Tom on MySpace. It’s no secret that the world of social media has not only evolved over the last fifteen years, but it has exploded. In fact, technology itself has taken over the mediums we once knew as “media” and formed into an animal all its own. Newspaper subscriptions are now online editions, YouTube has created hosts, singers, makeup artists and comedians, and the ways in which we communicate with one another are not just through written word anymore, but through a variety of virtual vocabularies.

social-media-youth-health-phone-screenIn 2008, I was in my social media prime. There were so many social media positions available and I was exactly what they were looking for, young, knowledgable and grew up with this booming technology. I could set up a Facebook note, I could schedule a post, I could make your blog look like you paid me twice as much to do it. I had gotten my first social media marketing gig and while I was nailing the Facebook growth, there was this website called Twitter, which alluded me, so, in an effort to better understand how this 140 character blab fest could be used to sell our products, I set up my own account and played around. What I learned, very quickly, was that Twitter wasn’t a place for teenagers to mindlessly jibber-jabber, and it also wasn’t a place to sell – it was a platform on which to build community. (more…)

Here Comes The Stress July 20, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Following Your Dreams, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World, Relationships, Wedding.
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A little over three weeks ago I made a solemn DLIH promise to be more active, post more articles, and long wedding_4story short, just be better. Then I went on two back-to-back vacations and, oh yeah, got a little ring to wear on my left hand. Traveling has never stopped me from posting before, so being overseas wasn’t necessarily the issue. The problem arose when all my “free” time was now suddenly filled with wedding ideas and planning. Let me just say, I’ve watched a lot of TLC and WE in my day so I was full prepared to not be a Bridezilla and not let this wedding take over my life, I also didn’t want DLIH to become wedding central. So, with my mind on a wedding and a wedding on my mind, you can imagine all other ideas involving life and writing were few and far between.

Then something occurred to me, talking about my wedding, or any wedding, does not mean writing a nine paragraph post on how to make a doily or pick out candle wax colors. What I am realizing is that I am feeling very alone in this process, this process that has been glorified by so many people before me. In all my searches online I have found all the standard advice “Take deep breaths”, “Don’t make rash decisions”, “Do what you want to do, not what your guests want”, but I haven’t found any real advice. (more…)

Stop Thinking Like a 30-Something, Start Thinking For Yourself! May 4, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, children, Dating, Education, Family, Following Your Dreams, Friendships, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Relationships.
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If you have’t noticed yet, I re-post a lot of Elite Daily articles. It’s a site I really admire because they have a lot of great things to say, especially to twenty-somethings. Most recently, I found this article on how those in their 20’s need to stop thinking like those in their 30’s. While I was reading it, I found myself disagreeing with many of the points that were made. I like reading different people’s views or opinions on life, most of all, how their experiences have shaped them, and I do think that there are always beneficial moments to take from everything you read. However, when we are encouraging or supporting those who are coming up after us, I think it’s very important to reinforce positive information for all types of people and all sorts of girls. We come from different backgrounds, upbringings and cultures, so there cannot be an end all be all of how to live your life, or grown-up or shape your future. So, here is my own version of Why 20-Something Women Need To Stop Thinking Like 30-Something Women (but instead, think for themselves!) –

We have all totally been “that girl”. That girl who had two too many glasses of Pinot and starts off on her pity party about never falling in love, having a baby too late in life, never making it in her career, “I just don’t get what’s wrong with me! How is Lindsay Lohan, who’s a total mess, famous and buying houses and cars while I’m an educated, smart, caring girl and I can’t even get a full-time job, or a boyfriend, or a nice apartment?!” I know I’ve been that girl. (more…)

How to Not Give a F@&K! April 7, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Following Your Dreams, Life Lessons/Growing Up.
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A phenomenal article about just not giving a flipping *bleep*. Plus, there’s a kitten on the cover. If you’ve ever wanted to master the art of being you, and not caring about what anyone else thinks, take a gander. Behind all the humor and profanity, there is a strong and true message which we can all apply to our lives. Plus, the word burrito is used about four times. 

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Huge thanks to Mark Manson for writing it! Follow him on twitter: @iammarkmanson Boom! and read more of his stuff at markmanson.net.

Do What You Want! March 18, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Following Your Dreams, Friendships, Life Lessons/Growing Up.
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All dressed up and nowhere to go – sound familiar? In our twenties we spend much of our time waiting on other people; waiting to go out, waiting to join social groups, waiting to buy tickets, waiting to leave parties. What we don’t realize is that while we’re spending so much time waiting on other people, we aren’t actually following our own instincts or desires. How many times have you waited for a group of people to commit to an event, only to find that those “great deal!” tickets suddenly jumped up in cost by $50 each? Or that moment your friend said they’d let you know when they were ready to meet up, so you’ve been sitting all dressed with your hair and makeup done, waiting for some random text? Looking back, you only feel kind of dumb for not taking action when your gut told you to.

Now that I’m slowly moving out of my twenties, there are few things I regret, but I can definitely say it took me more than my handful of lessons to learn that waiting on other people is nothing but that, waiting. Much of this comes from our desire to not do things alone, quitting a job is a lot easier if your friend will also be leaving, or going to a volunteer meeting feels more comfortable if you know someone there. However, would we rather lose the opportunity to find a new job, or volunteer for an organization because we’re waiting on our friend to commit? Of course, we can’t walk through life just committing to things when we’ve told other people we’ll do it with them, nor can we control other people, at the end of the day if someone doesn’t call you back or doesn’t give you a straight answer, you can’t reach into their brain and read their mind. What we can do is make a conscious effort to make our own decisions on our own terms.

Have a time limit – if you’re waiting to buy concert tickets, or decided if you’re going to road trip to see a game, tell your friends when you need to know by, an actual date or time. “Because of my schedule, I need to know one way or the other by Tuesday night”, that way, if you haven’t heard, you can call everyone that morning and tell hem it’s yes or no by the end of the day. At that point, you can make your own plans and people who still want to join in can tag along with you.

Be a wrangler – sometimes the problem with not getting commitments is that no one is in charge. Be the point-person for events, meet-ups, going to parties together. Sometimes people want someone else to tell them where to be, at what time, and what to expect. It’ll make it easier to get responses from people if they already know you’re the person to talk to. (more…)

The Keys to Success March 14, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in 21st Century/Technology, Finances, Following Your Dreams, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Tips and Tricks.
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Learn to laugh at yourself. Invest in your future. Take responsibility. Have a thick skin. Don’t be afraid to take risks. 

What do all these things have in common? Success. Success isn’t something you stumble upon, it’s something you work towards. This article illustrates some of the top traits successful people have, and how to hone in on your own success! Whether it’s in class, at work, or in your personal growth, success is what you make of it!

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Boxed Into Your Job February 24, 2015

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Finances, Following Your Dreams, How To, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World.
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I DO NOT DO SALES. It’s like I need to tattoo it onto my forehead for people to hear me clearly. I’ve done sales once or twice in my life, I’ve been fairly good at it, so that’s all people hear, that’s all they see, that’s all I am to them.What am I really? I am a human being with ambition. I am a person who wants to be constantly challenged and if I’m giving the chance, I’ll prove that i can be trusted, and that I can exceed people’s expectations. What I am not is a one trick pony. What I am not is a person who can only be good at one thing.

glass_ceilingDo you ever feel like all your boss sees you as is what you are? For many of us, this is the case, whether it’s the profession we’ve chosen or the company we work for, we are only seen as the job we hold, we are only as good as our last day of work. There is this culture in American that if you work hard and long and always say yes, you’ll get a promotion and you’ll grow, however, for many jobs that’s just not true. If you’ve ever been labeled at your job, you understand. That new job opens up in a different department, and it’s something you know you’d just rock at, but when you apply your supervisors tell you that they’re really looking for someone with more specific experience, or that they are really happy with where you are now and a promotion in your division should open up soon. How are you supposed to respond to that? It’s both a compliment and in insult all at once. Better yet, the employers who do offer you a job, for something you did two years ago, because to them that is what you do. Despite how much you’ve grown as a person, despite your age, the place you are in your life, your expenses. Thanks for thinking I was good when we worked together 24 months ago, but now I’m even better, and I’m ready for something new! That internship was awesome when I was 22, I’m almost 25 now and I don’t want to be in the same office space as someone learning how to refill a stapler. (more…)

The Pressure of Finding a Role Model August 18, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Education, Family, Following Your Dreams, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World.
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“I want you to write a one page essay on the person in your life who inspires you.” If you haven’t heard that at least five times, then you surely didn’t go to school in America. Ever since we were children, we were groomed to, essentially, find someone to look up to. We’ve constantly been asked about who we look up to, who lights the fire under us, who we want to be like. Then, there’s me.

When I was a toddler I had two things on my mind, what to do and how to do it. There was no bad influence from the TV, there were no crazy ideas that I developed after watching someone else, everything I did, I did of my own volition. You could say, I was a super determined kid, and really self motivating. It would also be safe to say I never wanted to do things like everyone else did them, I wanted to find my own, unique way to go about it. So, when my very first English teacher asked me to talk about someone who inspired me, I didn’t really know what to say.

Everyone has people they admire for certain parts of their personality. You could say you are inspired by a person’s strength, courage, kindness, outgoing personality, a person’s ability to be fearless, and so on. You can also be moved by someone’s story, or feel driven by their accomplishments. To say that there is a person I owe my entire lifestyle to, well, that person would be me.

IMG_0102.JPGI know that sounds selfish, but it doesn’t come from a selfish place. I don’t have just one person to thank for where I am, but an entire list; (more…)