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Why I Do What I Do May 14, 2014

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Family, Jobs and Work, Life Lessons/Growing Up, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World, Relationships, Traveling.
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If you’ve been following Doing Laundry in Heels on Twitter you’re awesome and if you haven’t, you’re seriously flawed.

Just kidding, what I meant to say, was that if you’ve been following Doing Laundry in Heels on Twitter you’ve also been following the DLIH travel trials and tribulations. You may have also been wondering what I’ve been doing, where I’ve been going, and mostly, why. To answer your questions, my fellow DLIHers, a while back I accepted a job that required me to start traveling in early 2014, so off I’ve been; planes, trains and automobiles all over the country. What makes a business traveler a business traveler? Well, a cocktail of things: a love of traveling, seeing new places, visiting with people, enjoying being in an airplane, road-triping by oneself, enjoying staying in hotels, tolerating packing, and being brave enough to handle the problems as they come, unforeseen and sometimes inevitable. I do this because I enjoy it, it’s a fabulous opportunity, but sometimes you do things because they benefit other people too.

You’ve always heard mothers tell their children “Your father works very hard to give us this life that we have, all these nice things.” it’s a foreign idea, when you don’t have children, or a spouse, or a “nice job” that gives you “nice things”. What I’ve learned from my travels, and from the people I’ve met, is that “nice job” and “nice things” are in the eye of the beholder.
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At the start of my traveling journey, I met a couple who, once they found out I was in a relationship, asked me how I enjoyed this aspect of my job. He has traveled for the majority of their marriage, and she was always at home, waiting for him to return but then leave again. From the outside, it appears like a very uncomfortable way to live, but to them, it was a lifesaver. They “appreciated” their time together much more, they rarely fell into a rut or boring norm, and they had the time to miss each other and be excited to see each other. Once he retired, they spent much more time together, but it didn’t hurt them; because they had so much time apart earlier, this was a new thing for them, and they were enjoying it. It got me thinking about how valuable this job was to my relationship. We were never having problems, but space is healthy, and missing each other is fun. The more I travel, the more I find I still get butterflies when I come home, something I can’t really admit I felt in the last two plus years that I had a normal job.

Having a job doesn’t just give you spiritual and emotional things, but of course, monetary things. There are rewards that don’t involve getting a paycheck. Points for hotel stays and car rentals, airline miles and even a bump in your credit score from a company card. These aren’t reason to take a job, they also aren’t reason to try to be out of town, but they are a nice reminder of why you do what you do. One of these days, we’re going to go on a nice vacation; if my mom wants to come visit me, I can treat her with an airline ticket; if we’re ever in a bind and need a rental car fast, I can use my points in an emergency. These are the little things you don’t think of.

I love to travel, but I can’t say I love being away from home. After all, working so many days in a row, being by yourself, then coming back and needing to catch-up, none of these things are fun. If I had it my way, and only my way, maybe I wouldn’t travel, or I wouldn’t travel as often, but when I’m out there driving three hours all alone, I keep in mind, not only the valuable experiences I’m gaining, but what I am giving back to the others in my life. Sure, I don’t make a six figure salary, I don’t have a fancy car, or a luxurious apartment, or am able to buy my parents expensive things from brand name stores. I can’t give “nice things” in that way, but I can give things that might be more valuable. Love, generosity, selflessness.

In our world, everything is physical, material, weighed in gold and green, but taking a step back to see how I can contribute to what’s really important in life; the larger lessons, makes what I do, a little more worth it.

SK…”I DON’T GET IT!” July 28, 2013

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in 21st Century/Technology, Causes, H-Blog, Humor, Life Lessons/Growing Up, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World, Traveling.
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We all know about video blogging…well, looks like DLIH is tipping it’s high heeled toes into the lake of face to face online venting! (or, at least, that’s what I call it!) Welcome to the video blog of Doing Laundry in Heels: H-Blog! ….Heels Blog, of course!

H-Blog: SK…”I DON’T GET IT!”

 

Please comment and let me know what you thought and what you’d like to hear me H-Blog about!!!!

SK Likes It!- Product Reviews November 6, 2012

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, H-Blog, Health and Fitness, MTA/Public Transportation, Review, Shopping.
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We all know about video blogging…well, looks like DLIH is tipping it’s high heeled toes into the lake of face to face online venting! (or, at least, that’s what I call it!) Welcome to the video blog of Doing Laundry in Heels: H-Blog! ….Heels Blog, of course!

H-Blog: SK Likes It! Product Reviews

If you’ve got a phenomenal product I have yet to discover, let me know asap! You might see it in a future review!!!

Please comment and let me know what you thought and what you’d like to hear me H-Blog about!!!!

Slap You with my Headphones! June 12, 2012

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, H-Blog, Humor, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World.
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We all know about video blogging…well, looks like DLIH is tipping it’s high heeled toes into the lake of face to face online venting! (or, at least, that’s what I call it!) Welcome to the video blog of Doing Laundry in Heels: H-Blog! ….Heels Blog, of course!

H-Blog: Slap You with my Headphones!

Please comment and let me know what you thought and what you’d like to hear me H-Blog about!!!!

MTA – May Take Awhile November 15, 2011

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, MTA/Public Transportation.
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In light of current events, the kind you wont read in the newspaper, the long-awaited and anticipated MTA rant is here. Without further ado, the story of MTA – May Take Awhile.

There’s a general way to go about riding the subway, some people try their hardest to accommodate their fellow train riders but others, it seems, are missing the genetic makeup of logic it takes to simply get from point A. to point B. For example, if the door opens and you happen to be a relatively larger than average human… As in, your take up the space of almost the entire door, it’s advisable to move when the train doors open. Also, if the subway doors happen to open and you’re the size of Thumeblia’s teacup poodle, it is STILL advisable for you to MOVE your skinny behind. Now, when faced with this situation, as so many of us often are, it’s not always easy to maneuver, nor understand who should enter or exit first, but as a general rule, if I, a human, who is dense and takes up space, am walking into the car it’s neither physically nor even figuratively possible for you to walk through the exact same, small hole I am walking through at the exact same time… Unless, of course, I am invisible and ignorant to my super powers.
Next, we’ve finally made it onto the train, luckily most people are smart enough to walk to the middle of the car, so for those getting on last, it’s probably polite to acknowledge this and NOT squish those people, as if being in the middle of the car is a team sport. You know what is also NOT a group activity ? Carrying each other’s man purses. Now, I understand you may want caress the delicate, expensive, leather pouch on my shoulder and while I appreciate the flattery, really, YOUR bag does not need to be up my nose or doing the booty drop with MY booty. Let’s keep our fanny packs to ourselves.

So, as if commuting with your family isn’t bad enough, as adults we must resort to commuting with total strangers who not only invade our space but try to feed us their backpacks for breakfast, given the circumstances we’re placed in, you’d think the public transit authority would cut us some slack and actually transport us places…not MTA, my friends, not MTA. No matter how perfectly you time your trip, you’ll nearly always be late or deathly early in avoidance of being late. In the middle of morning rush hour, you’d expect some traffic, stalling, people holding doors, what you DON’T plan for is your train to be A. re-routed express to the last stop and B. re-routed to the last stop for A DIFFERENT LINE! And so begins the mass exodus of frustrated humans trying to get on a local train all the way back to get the right train to the correct final destination. Once at said final destination, it’s another brand new game of which bus will come first! Wooooowee, who will it be today?! Is it the Out Of Service Bus? The This-Bus-Will-Be-Making-75 extra stops-So-You-Can-Be-Late? How about no bus at all?! WHOA! Not Tuesday, November 15th, today was a special day, not only was there a Not In Service bus but there were also THREE buses that came all at once, oh Dear Lord, which one shall I choose?! Maybe they could at least make it fun and race, hey, there’s a thought…if we made it a race to the finish line (the finish line being my stop, of course) maybe I’d actually get to work on time! You see! Shoots and Ladders was always a good business proposal.

The Cold New Yorker April 20, 2011

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, Dating, Friendships, Men, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World, Women.
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New Yorkers are notorious for being labeled at rude, when in actuality, were some of the friendliest people on earth. We’re used to diversity and adversity and we may not like each other everyday but we always respect each other because we know what it is to struggle in New York and we know what it is to make it. Still, while being one of the friendliest cultures, we’re also one of the faith-less; we’ve seen too much to trust just anybody and we take great effort to prove that. Basically we lost faith in each other…

I see beggars on the subway everyday, some I listen to, some I don’t and even the ones I want to help I can’t because I don’t know if their story is real, I don’t know. Well, I saw a man the other day asking if someone with an unlimited subway pass would swipe him through. The general rule is never to do it, the general rule is to look straight and keep walking. A kind stranger didn’t follow the rule, he swiped his card and the man proceeded down the stairs. While waiting for the train I observed him, he was dressed normally, he wasn’t homeless and it looked like he had a few bags of groceries. It dawned on me that this man probably just couldn’t afford a subway ride at $2.50 one way. Maybe he lost his card and didn’t have cash or credit to buy another. He was just trying to get home and put his groceries in the fridge, yet 20 maybe 30 people walked passed him without so much as blinking. It made me think about why we act the way we act, why some of the friendliest people I know, put the blinders on?

What really prompted to write this article was something I read by Single City Guy. He tells the story of how he met a woman on the L train, they struck up a conversation and before parting ways, he got her number. It opened up my eyes like someone flicking the lights on in a dark room. I’ve had countless men strike up conversations with me in the subway, COUNTLESS and I shut them all down. I answered their questions and laughed at their jokes but I never send a single vibe of “I’m interested” much less, give them something to work off of…. I mean really! What is my problem!? Women in New York get hit on every single day and most of it is just inappropriate, so we put up this wall to show how little we care that you’re calling us “Sweet Buns” while were walking passed 18th St. but we forget to take that wall down when someone just wants to say hi. It’s hard to trust people when you’re getting cat calls every day, sure, there’s not doubt about it, but not every man is out to disrespect me so why am I acting like a cold, moody, devil in heels?

I don’t think the “Cold New Yorker” is something we’re taught, I think it’s something we come up with on our own. I think it’s hard to be the person in the crowd who’s going to give a homeless man a dollar or ask the person sitting next to you where she got her shoes. It’s not exactly “normal” but who’s missing out on life? The tourist who has no inhibitions or you? “You are the only people who don’t know what your city looks like…because your so busy being ‘cool’ that you never take the time to look up.” [Chris Reno]

It’s Like the Subway January 29, 2011

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Men, MTA/Public Transportation, Online Dating, Real World, Women.
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You know how you get on the 1 train, make sure to get that corner seat at the end of the row, and cocoon yourself in the world of your I-pod. After one or two stops you start to look around because the old woman across from you has begun to stare motionless, and frankly, it’s creepy. So here you are, looking around and BAM just as the train pulls into the station you see the most scrumptious male ever! He has nice clothes, decent hair, a great hat, he’s wearing an i-pod too so you know he likes music and then dundundun, as he sits down just seats opposite you, he pulls out a book, intelligent too! Who knew?! In an effort to play it cool you gaze in his general area rather than staring right at him and drooling, and then you see him, Mr. 45 year-old, balding guy giving you the eye. Eh, so much for trying to get cutie’s attention when you’re now confined to staring at your new old lady friend across the way. So there you go, three stops later, he gets off and you never see him again. Except, on the internet he’s always there, the subway never stops, the doors don’t open and cuties don’t get off. Creepers can be blocked, old men can be put in their place, and balding guys can photoshop just enough to appear they’ve got hair.  Everybody wins. Internet dating, it’s like the subway…but better?

Once I discovered my own discovery, I took it upon myself to re-route my own mental visualization, if you will, of this internet dating profile thing. Instead of “winking” or “poking”, “waving” or “flirting…dude, I’m just gonna send you a message, say hi, tell ya why I like ya and if you don’t write back. Cool, next train! A lot of people seem to be on these sites for the same reasons, not excluding myself: A. They want to meet someone but their job doesn’t allow them to for various reason B. The time they are outside of work they aren’t out to meet people, they’re out to relax C. While it’s still possible to meet people at bars, it’s not exactly a favorable setting; alcohol, dark lighting, loud music. I’ve met so many friends online, I’ve made a lot of business connections this way, I’m not signing-up for a site that’s going to ask me a million questions from how long I brush my teeth in seconds to what my deepest, darkest fear is and spit out my husband. I’m in “a bar” that serves milkshakes instead of Jameson, the lights are bright instead of clouded and the music is low and sweet, a song everyone loves but doesn’t feel the need to sing the words to and I’m wearing a sign that says “I like baseball, puppies, heels and Mexican food.”

So, here was are again, all cozy on the internet together, bundled up in the subway of cyber space and I’m wondering, is this reversible? Is my line of thinking applicable the other ways? If I’m being more open minded, less impressionable but also going for what I want, putting fears or opinions aside what’s to say I can’t do this in the real world at the exact, same time? Double your pleasure, double your fun! Well, I CAN and I WILL! Although…I may not wear the sign, that comes across a little more “homeless” than I generally like to give off on a first date.

It’s not easy in this world of NYC to starting talk to people, smiling at people, reacting to people you’d normally just walk by. No wonder we’re all on dating sites…because we don’t talk in the subway, we don’t talk at all unless we’re ordering at Starbucks! Still, if anything it opens up the world, if theres one person on this match site that’s going to read my profile and think “Hey, she’s really cool”..then theres going to be one person on my subway platform who’s going to think “Hey…she’s not hiding behind her I-pod..that’s different.” and smile back. There you have it folks “What Internet Dating Taught Me.” Look for it in Barnes and Noble, Fall 2013 😉

The Things We Don’t Do August 20, 2010

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, Life Lessons/Growing Up, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World, Relationships.
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Why is it we do the things we don’t do?

I’m about to tell you your life story so be prepared. You’re sitting on the subway and the cutest guy ever steps on and sits down right across from you, he looks up and smiles. You burry your eyes back into your book. For the next 8 stops you play the “I’m not looking” game with each other and then you get up and you get off at your stop. You don’t stop thinking about him for the next week, you never see him again. What is it about being impulsive and daring in a situation that seems to be weaved by Fate that makes us so hesitant? Is it the mentality of “Why should I bother, I’m never going to see this person again?”…that’s how it’s always been for me. Sitting, thinking, praying that the other person will make the move, all the while they’re probably thinking the same thing.
I’m reading a great book called The Celestine Prophecy, it talks of the inexistence of coincidences, something I have always truly believed. Everything is in our life for a reason, every moment is a link in the chain to the next moment. We walk around complaining that “the one” is out there somewhere and we wish we could find them but maybe we have missed the mark? Maybe subway boy or central park girl or your waitress was the link you were supposed to clasp?
I feel like there are only two schools of thinking and you have to choose the one that’s closest to what’s in your heart. Fate gives you lemons and you make lemonade and if you don’t, the lemons disappear. Poof gone, magic! You’re given one chance to make due with what you’ve got and if you pass it by it’s gone, you’re never going to see that person again. The second way of looking at it is perhaps the one I prefer more. Things happen as they’re meant to happen in a sequential order. If you sat down on the same subway a year later and the same guy got on then it’s only emphasizing that the conversation between you two is inevitable, so put the ball into motion. Kick that thing like a 4th grader in gym class! You may score a homerun! It’s a risk but you never planned to see him again, so here’s the second chance you’re definitely never going to get again.

I don’t think there’s a right answer to this question, we could slap ourselves for the chances we don’t take but dwelling on it won’t do the world any good, no endangered species will be saved by your self inflicted stress. After pondering this entire theory for a few days, I came to the conclusion that I’m going to act more, I’m going to throw things out there and test life. The farthest you can fall is the ground and at 5’6″…I’m not really awfully tall enough to be afraid of that. Bruises on my ass can heal, I promise.

La Cucaracha Rides Again! June 29, 2010

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, MTA/Public Transportation.
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Yesterday, I stood at 59th Street and Lexington and watched the Q train whiz by. It looked somehow out of place and unusual, sure the Q train looks just like the W, all shiny and silver but I couldn’t help but feel a pang of something for the W that transported me all over Manhattan and Queens so many times.  I live off a  R, V stop and having cursed the V train so many times, I now realize how short life truly is. Not even 10 years old, the V train was ripped out from under us and replaced with a downtown somebody named Mr. M.  The B,D, F, …M, doesn’t quite roll of my tongue yet.

Others in my area, too, have suffered from the depression that is losing our beloved modes of transportation.  So, in light of the line changes that look place the last week of June, I’ve decided to call upon a good friend, one that has made many laugh last year and I hope will lighten the mood once again. An article that every New Yorker can relate to, a place where we can all find comfort in hating the Metropolitan Transportation Authority.

…Another stage, another show, but still the good ‘ole MTA. La Cucaracha rides again!
Dedicated to the late V, W trains.

We’ve Defied Intelligence June 26, 2010

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, MTA/Public Transportation.
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The human level of incompetence is truly amazing…I mean, we should give out awards for this shit, it’s superhuman. We’ve defied intelligence.
Unknown to me, I am a genius. I have this uncanny ability to print out new flyers when we’ve run out, turn on my blinker when planning to make a turn, change the toilet paper roll when it runs out, put the scissors back in the drawer after I’ve used them, and, now I don’t want to cause anyone to faint but… I can actually do all this without being asked or reminded! Whoa…I know, are you okay? Maybe you should sit down before you read any further. This is intense stuff, my friends. I’ve reached such a high level of intelligence, in fact, that I have surpassed the ability to even understand these minions I call peers. I walk into the office where a co-worker is making a failing attempt to carry a large box and as a “Hi?” slowly melts out of my mouth all I can wonder is “How long has my other colleague been sitting here enjoying the show?” I do recall a kindergarten lesson, way back when, where we learned how to help others because it’s the logical, right, moral thing to do? Did I ask you to take a bullet for the chick you see once a week that works in a totally different department, no, but you’re trying to have a social conversation while someone voluntarily crushes a lung trying to carry a box the size of the USSR. Maybe if I didn’t have reason and wit just seeping out of me I’d understand how the minds of human’s now work in this new, 2010 we speak of. I missed the memo.
The other day I was waiting for the 6 train at Hunter College, when the first train came by it was packed to the rush-hour-max even though it was only 8:30 am. So I decided to wait for the next train but as the first one left I noticed every car except the one I had planned to get into was nearly empty, alright…noted. I moved down on the platform and when the next train came it was moderately full. I waited for the exit-ers to step out and then shuffled in with the rest of the crowd. One after the other they all proceeded to stop just after entering, forcing me to shove them all in like a pile of old stuffed animals in your closet. I meandered between the bodies “Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me!” and found myself one door down. Me and a total of three other people. Spacial awareness much? I turned to look back at the 15 + people huddled together at the first door, most of them glaring at me probably thinking what a rude, inappropriate little girl I was pushing and shoving my way through. I glared right back wondering how STUPID the human race has the capacity to be. I, Sofia, am standing with so much open space around me I could do a cartwheel without bursting anyone’s personal bubble and you Neanderthals choose to seek comfort in numbers. Um…to qualify for a documentary I think you ACTUALLY have to be a penguin who ACTUALLY does a march in Antarctica, but I admire the effort.
All sarcasm aside (okay…not really), I just DON’T get it. This has nothing to do with Ivy League schools, GPA’s and reading thick books by people named Joyce. I’m talking about basic human knowledge and moral logic. I miss the days of primitive contact, our vocabulary may have been minimal and our outhouses non-existent but when someone handed you an apple you grunted a thank you. Can we honestly place the blame on anyone but ourselves? Have we truly let our species slide down the slippery, steep slope of stupidliness?…am I the only one of my kind still using alliterations? I fear the answer may be yes.